For me, going to school was always about becoming better. Moving towards becoming an expert in what I was studying. In part, this was encouraged by my parents who instilled the values of anything worth doing is worth doing well and partly due to being adept at learning new things and the satisfaction it brought.
As a teacher, I am more often than not frustrated by students who care little about their education. And, as I get to know some of these students better, I do side with them. A little. I can't imagine being 16 years old and still sitting in math class when math beyond simple numeracy will have no benefit to my career. For some of these students, the courses they are forced to take to earn their coveted high school diplomas are subjects that completely elude them. I can't imagine sitting there, struggling to learn. Until freedom at age 18.
And while part of me gets so angry that many students in high schools throw their gift of education away, what really makes me angry is when programs that honour gifted students are shut down. I stumbled across the following video made by students from Peterborough Collegiate Vocational Institute. Their school, along with arts program for gifted performers is being closed down. The artist whose song they are singing, claims she cried when she heard their rendition, sung in the stair well of the soon to be closed school. I truly don't understand how our society and education system can support imprisoning students in classes they don't want to take, throwing money at programs to, at any cost, find alternatives to get students credits they don't want or need for their careers, but close down a school and program that students do want. A program that fosters talents and allowed the creation of this....
Saturday, December 17, 2011
Sunday, November 13, 2011
lost and found
In my last post I complained about hating struggling at the back of group rides. I figured what better way to get over this than to crash Watson's group ride in the Copeland today. I put a smile on my face and played follow the leader. Even though, Watson is mad at me for something, he kept the pace really easy (easy for him, hard for me :) and somehow managed to defy physics, putting together a loop that involved lots of downhill without much up. I had a blast riding with the boys, who also included Tristan and Jeremy. Unfortunately, Parker forgot to set his alarm clock - definitely one of the most fun rides I've done this season. Something to be said about swallowing your pride, as I realize I've missed out on lots of fun rides for fear of being the weak link.
Got home and it was time for some chores...
Got home and it was time for some chores...
The garbage men are going to hate us - 28 bags of leaves!!!
Saturday, November 5, 2011
The Wheel of Fortune
'The Wheel of Fortune,' I say. 'It is your card: you drew it.... It tells us that we all only want victory. We all want to triumph. But we all have to learn to endure what comes. We have to learn to treat misfortune and great fortune with indifference. That is wisdom.' ~ Philippa Gregory
I haven't written much about my races this year. Partly because there haven't been many to speak of. Mostly because I've been greatly disappointed in my performance. And yes, I did have a sizable worm swimming around in my guts this year, but before I knew that, I found myself struggling to finish a race and not wanting to talk about it afterwards.
So the worm is gone, and I'm back to training. And my fitness is every so slowly returning. I did my last race of the season at Hardwood last weekend. My goal was to stay with the pack for as long as humanly possible. 100 metres after the start I began moving backwards and spent the rest of the race riding solo at the back.
I, like most people I am sure, hate losing. I don't even like going out on a group ride and being last up a hill or struggling at the back. I find myself anxiously awaiting the return of speed and I can't help thinking that just over a year ago, I was always vying for a spot on the podium.
It is time for me to look at my riding with some indifference. In the Wheel of Fortune, maybe I am climbing up to the top again, but at the moment I am somewhere near the bottom. Perhaps the key to indifference is enjoying the ride on the entire wheel, for all of its ups and downs and even when going sideways. I think that may be the only way for me to stay in the game.
above: struggling to hold on
below: riding solo
Tuesday, October 11, 2011
stubborn
I spent the first 1.5 years of my life with a displaced hip. It wasn't until I started learning to walk that my parents realized something was wrong. Stubborn, I walked anyways. Without a voice yet, it was easy for them to pull me to the doctors office without protest. Turns out it was something that should have been caught at birth. 6 months in a cast and 2 surgeries later, one without anesthetic as I was too young to undergo the drugs again, my hip was back in place.
There's something about those years that has shaped the way I deal with pain. I suffered for a year with a parasite, most of my life with a fairly severe gluten allergy, finished the Squeezer with a torn calf, Day 5 and 7 of TransRockies with Campylobacter and on Saturday rode Radical and on Monday half the Brewery to Brewery with a well sprained hand.
It's a combination of being stubborn, a reasonably high pain threshold and not wanting to miss out on something potentially fun. I finally let my mom drag me to the hospital after Thanksgiving Dinner was successfully served. We left before desert in the hopes of beating the post-Thanksgiving Dinner rush. Successful, we were in and out of RVH within 1.5 hours. Not broken, therefore I would ride the next day despite my mom's protests.
I didn't really notice the pain until we arrived in Creemore. After a chat with Jeremy, I decided to give in and call my mom to pick me up. At least I'd gotten to enjoy the most beautiful weather for our annual ride to date. It also elicited the biggest turnout for my favorite ride of the season.
I don't regret my decision to ride one bit, even though my puffy hand begs to differ. Perhaps one of these days, I'll be willing to miss out and listen to my body. But that day was not yesterday.
There's something about those years that has shaped the way I deal with pain. I suffered for a year with a parasite, most of my life with a fairly severe gluten allergy, finished the Squeezer with a torn calf, Day 5 and 7 of TransRockies with Campylobacter and on Saturday rode Radical and on Monday half the Brewery to Brewery with a well sprained hand.
It's a combination of being stubborn, a reasonably high pain threshold and not wanting to miss out on something potentially fun. I finally let my mom drag me to the hospital after Thanksgiving Dinner was successfully served. We left before desert in the hopes of beating the post-Thanksgiving Dinner rush. Successful, we were in and out of RVH within 1.5 hours. Not broken, therefore I would ride the next day despite my mom's protests.
I didn't really notice the pain until we arrived in Creemore. After a chat with Jeremy, I decided to give in and call my mom to pick me up. At least I'd gotten to enjoy the most beautiful weather for our annual ride to date. It also elicited the biggest turnout for my favorite ride of the season.
I don't regret my decision to ride one bit, even though my puffy hand begs to differ. Perhaps one of these days, I'll be willing to miss out and listen to my body. But that day was not yesterday.
amazing turnout and beautiful weather for the 8th annual Thanksgiving Brewery to Brewery ride
Monday, October 3, 2011
my Knight in Shining Spandex
It just seemed too cold to warm up. With promises of a neutral start, I mostly skipped the warmup in favour of more time in my down jacket and toque. I did a little spin with Spak and Jeremy with a couple of sprints thrown in to try to wake up the legs, okay, one of those sprints was to get away from some pretty scary looking sea gulls.
Then, the neutral start for Tour de King was off... I fully blame myself for not knowing that it was only 400m of neutral start, before the race started on a sharp right hander onto a steep grassy hill that felt like being woken up by a bucket full of cold water. The next thing I know, I was busting out my well honed track standing skills waiting to get into the single track and then rode an easy pace behind what seemed like hundreds of cross bikes. Got to the road and watched the cross bikes speed away. I put my head down and kept going.
Got to the King Trails and cherished my solo time. Finally, a chance to reap the benefits of being on a mountain bike. Caught back up to the folks on cross bikes near the end of the trail. Knowing that was the last bit of single track, I tried to pick off a few of them before I got to the road in the hopes of ending on the road section amidst some sort of pack. Came through to the parking lot to see Jeremy who had pulled from his race due to some sort of fiasco with his contact lenses.
He was waiting for me to finish the race with. I was so happy to see him, I think I even promised that he doesn't have to cook dinner this Wednesday. I think I was also delirious at that point. Oh well, a promise is a promise (ahem, Watson). Good to have someone to draft off for the rest of the race and some motivation to keep the effort up - I convinced myself that he would leave me behind if he got cold from not having to work hard enough.
Crossed the line and put on every bit of clothing I had. Then, enjoyed a great afternoon catching up with friends and a great barbeque after another amazing Chico event.
Then, the neutral start for Tour de King was off... I fully blame myself for not knowing that it was only 400m of neutral start, before the race started on a sharp right hander onto a steep grassy hill that felt like being woken up by a bucket full of cold water. The next thing I know, I was busting out my well honed track standing skills waiting to get into the single track and then rode an easy pace behind what seemed like hundreds of cross bikes. Got to the road and watched the cross bikes speed away. I put my head down and kept going.
Got to the King Trails and cherished my solo time. Finally, a chance to reap the benefits of being on a mountain bike. Caught back up to the folks on cross bikes near the end of the trail. Knowing that was the last bit of single track, I tried to pick off a few of them before I got to the road in the hopes of ending on the road section amidst some sort of pack. Came through to the parking lot to see Jeremy who had pulled from his race due to some sort of fiasco with his contact lenses.
He was waiting for me to finish the race with. I was so happy to see him, I think I even promised that he doesn't have to cook dinner this Wednesday. I think I was also delirious at that point. Oh well, a promise is a promise (ahem, Watson). Good to have someone to draft off for the rest of the race and some motivation to keep the effort up - I convinced myself that he would leave me behind if he got cold from not having to work hard enough.
Crossed the line and put on every bit of clothing I had. Then, enjoyed a great afternoon catching up with friends and a great barbeque after another amazing Chico event.
photo courtesy Jacqueline Shaver
Sunday, September 25, 2011
I don't really hate my husband - Fall Epic 8 Hour
I love my husband. But, there were several hours yesterday where love turned to hatred. Usually, I am the one pushing him to do races. I even convinced him that TransRockies would be a better honeymoon than a few weeks in France riding bicycles and drinking good wine.
So, yesterday was his day. He proposed we ride the 8 hour tag, which I went along with. It wasn't until the day before that I realized my longest ride this summer has been more in the 2 hour range. He also decided that instead of the classic he goes, I go, he goes, etc., that he would bust out a fast first lap and then pass off to me to ride 3-4 hours and then he would finish the day. Not the fastest way to complete an 8 hour, but less painful than the alternative stop/start.
As my hours on the bike wore on and grumpiness settled in, I grumbled something about there being a 'tag' in tag-team as I went by the AWI tent. But, Jeremy was there each lap to offer some yelling and encouragement that kept me riding my fastest. And, while I proclaimed my hatred of him for 'making me do this' while out on my last lap, it is not true. Jeremy is an amazing husband, who I love very much. I am glad he pushed me to do this race, as I impressed myself by pulling off pretty consistent lap times and after his encouragement was even able to make my last one, one of the fastest.
After my laps were over, I thoroughly enjoyed the afternoon recovering, eating and socializing. Jeremy moved us up in the standings from 8th to 6th place, blowing himself up pretty good in the process. And, I would do the race again, glady. But, don't tell him that. For once, Jeremy deserved a day where I go along with his ideas ;)
So, yesterday was his day. He proposed we ride the 8 hour tag, which I went along with. It wasn't until the day before that I realized my longest ride this summer has been more in the 2 hour range. He also decided that instead of the classic he goes, I go, he goes, etc., that he would bust out a fast first lap and then pass off to me to ride 3-4 hours and then he would finish the day. Not the fastest way to complete an 8 hour, but less painful than the alternative stop/start.
As my hours on the bike wore on and grumpiness settled in, I grumbled something about there being a 'tag' in tag-team as I went by the AWI tent. But, Jeremy was there each lap to offer some yelling and encouragement that kept me riding my fastest. And, while I proclaimed my hatred of him for 'making me do this' while out on my last lap, it is not true. Jeremy is an amazing husband, who I love very much. I am glad he pushed me to do this race, as I impressed myself by pulling off pretty consistent lap times and after his encouragement was even able to make my last one, one of the fastest.
After my laps were over, I thoroughly enjoyed the afternoon recovering, eating and socializing. Jeremy moved us up in the standings from 8th to 6th place, blowing himself up pretty good in the process. And, I would do the race again, glady. But, don't tell him that. For once, Jeremy deserved a day where I go along with his ideas ;)
no pics from the 8 hour, but the above are a somewhat comical sequence of Jeremy rescuing me and my bike from a fairly deep and fast moving river during last year's TransRockies.
Monday, September 12, 2011
Provincials
As a kid growing up with a rather strict British dad, there were several rules to be followed. Eat with your fork in your left hand and your knife in your right, always say Thank You, speak just loud enough so that those around you can hear, but you don't disturb other conversations. The list goes on, but those are the good ones that I remember and that I still follow to this day. There is one rule, however that has become a part of my adult life that I broke yesterday: you never enter a competition you haven't prepared for.
I'll never forget my dad pulling me from a skating competition. I was 10 years old and I had starting slacking at practices. The night before a meet my dad told me I wasn't competing. "Start practicing more and I'll let you enter the next one", he told me in his to the point, no nonsense, don't argue with me fashion. It was a good lesson. One that made me a better competitor and made me not just try my best on game day, but in practices too.
Yesterday I raced provincials. I was nowhere close to ready. Rides since I've felt better have been completely unstructured and I knew I was slow. But, I needed to get back out there. I needed to feel what it was like to feel like a hero for 30 minutes and like death for an hour. I needed the feeling of digging deeper for any amount of energy you have left to finish the race. So, I broke the rule that has governed my competitive life since childhood, I swallowed my pride knowing that I would not be a contender. I lost the race in a spectacular fashion. But, it felt so good to be back.
Big thanks to all the spectators cheering for me, even though the next girl was 10 minutes ahead of me. I even had some cheers from my fellow racers while out on the course. You guys rock! Thanks for welcoming me back in such a warm fashion. Standing in the start pen with you felt like coming home. And lastly, an enormous Thank You to Caleb for the perfect feed.
I have two racing friends that were also out this year. I hope you are better soon and back out there. We miss you!
I'll never forget my dad pulling me from a skating competition. I was 10 years old and I had starting slacking at practices. The night before a meet my dad told me I wasn't competing. "Start practicing more and I'll let you enter the next one", he told me in his to the point, no nonsense, don't argue with me fashion. It was a good lesson. One that made me a better competitor and made me not just try my best on game day, but in practices too.
Yesterday I raced provincials. I was nowhere close to ready. Rides since I've felt better have been completely unstructured and I knew I was slow. But, I needed to get back out there. I needed to feel what it was like to feel like a hero for 30 minutes and like death for an hour. I needed the feeling of digging deeper for any amount of energy you have left to finish the race. So, I broke the rule that has governed my competitive life since childhood, I swallowed my pride knowing that I would not be a contender. I lost the race in a spectacular fashion. But, it felt so good to be back.
Big thanks to all the spectators cheering for me, even though the next girl was 10 minutes ahead of me. I even had some cheers from my fellow racers while out on the course. You guys rock! Thanks for welcoming me back in such a warm fashion. Standing in the start pen with you felt like coming home. And lastly, an enormous Thank You to Caleb for the perfect feed.
I have two racing friends that were also out this year. I hope you are better soon and back out there. We miss you!
slower than in races past on the uphills
at least going down is just as fast :)
Thursday, September 8, 2011
Good things do come in small packages
It is September and my race season has really just begun. Finally healthy, I am super excited to race my bike. In my illness I lost 12 pounds and I joke that 6 pounds came from my left leg and the other 6 came from my right. But, in all seriousness - I think at least a couple of pounds came off my calves, glutes and biceps :)
So, eager to race and test my new parasite-free fitness I have done a few Wednesday night races at Hardwood. The series came to a close all too soon last week, so Jeremy and I decided to venture down to the King trails for their weekly series.
The race has a real small town feel. After chatting with Matt P and Sean, who create a unique course each week through fast and fun flowy single track with at least one hill to remind you that you need to ride hills more often, we were soon swept up by one of the regular racers who took us on a tour of the trail.
The race went off at 6:45pm and I got lined up next to a decent sized field of women. They ranged in experience from beginner to fast and I soon realized I would have to work to have a decent race. After two laps of the course, I crossed the line in 4th. In true small town fashion, Jeremy and I were embraced by our new comrades and spent a good 45 minutes after the race chatting.
We'll be back there for the last race of their season next week. Promises of a post-ride trip to the pub, draw prizes, fun trails and great folks... looking forward to it! You should come too. Directions and info at: www.kingweeklyseries.com
So, eager to race and test my new parasite-free fitness I have done a few Wednesday night races at Hardwood. The series came to a close all too soon last week, so Jeremy and I decided to venture down to the King trails for their weekly series.
The race has a real small town feel. After chatting with Matt P and Sean, who create a unique course each week through fast and fun flowy single track with at least one hill to remind you that you need to ride hills more often, we were soon swept up by one of the regular racers who took us on a tour of the trail.
The race went off at 6:45pm and I got lined up next to a decent sized field of women. They ranged in experience from beginner to fast and I soon realized I would have to work to have a decent race. After two laps of the course, I crossed the line in 4th. In true small town fashion, Jeremy and I were embraced by our new comrades and spent a good 45 minutes after the race chatting.
We'll be back there for the last race of their season next week. Promises of a post-ride trip to the pub, draw prizes, fun trails and great folks... looking forward to it! You should come too. Directions and info at: www.kingweeklyseries.com
Saturday, September 3, 2011
Trek Women at Buckwallow
The Trek Women had our last ride at Buckwallow. We had a small, but incredibly keen group in attendance. Highlight of the day was when I went down a section of trail and told the ladies if they wanted a challenge to follow me, otherwise stay to the right. I looked back and not only did everyone follow, but everyone cleared the section. Personal highlight was clearing all of Bear Bluff for the first time. Good to ride with some strong females, as sometimes my ego is all that's needed to step up my game and not wuss out on the rocks : )
Thanks Eden for the pics...
Thanks Eden for the pics...
all smiles as the rain begins just as we finish our ride
being the only novice, Kim scored a private lesson with Erica
Sessioning some rocks
Tuesday, August 23, 2011
For sale: uber light race wheels - SOLD!
I am selling a set of 26" wheels. We (Jeremy) built them last year and I have only ridden them a few times. $675. Regular retail over $1100
contact: tammyjrobinson at hotmail.com
contact: tammyjrobinson at hotmail.com
SRAM XO cassette
Stans rims
WTB Laser Disc Lite hubs
Monday, August 22, 2011
For sale: hardtail -- SOLD!
I am selling my beloved hard tail... 15.5" Gary Fisher Frame. $850
Contact: tammyjrobinson at hotmail.com
Contact: tammyjrobinson at hotmail.com
it might be a little girly for the boys who aren't man enough for all the pink and white... but the pink bottle cage and cable housing are easily swapped out for other colours.
Avid Elixr Carbon brakes and SRAM XO shifters
SRAM XO rear derailleur
Bontrager Race Lite Wheels
XTR cranks (sorry, the R has been smudged off due to my terrible pedal stroke)
Chain rings... XTR for middle and big; BlackSpire for grannie
XT front derailleur
Chris King headset
Manitou R7 Fork
Sunday, August 7, 2011
not wanted on the voyage
I will spare you the gory details. The mystery of my GI illness is solved. I had a parasite. I can confidently state the last sentence in the past tense. Like I said, I'll spare you the details.
Slowly, my body is recovering. I stopped training what seems like forever ago. That was hard. Especially as I didn't know what was wrong and the MD kept blowing me off. I'm still waiting to get in to see a specialist! Little did I know that when my MD told me he would refer me to an Internist, what he actually meant was: 'let's just wait a little longer and see how sick you actually get'. You have to develop a loud voice when you're sick. I am thankful for Naturopaths.
I am also beginning to be thankful for my time off the bike. Especially now that, that time is not being spent between the couch and the bathroom.
So what have I been up to?...
I taught summer school to students who failed Grade 10 Math. I am not a Math teacher, but am pretty proud that 12 of the 20 students who started the class passed. I did not make it easy for them. I made them work for it. I made them learn every piece of the curriculum and they had to pass everything. Definitely rewarding to see them so proud of themselves on the last day, knowing that there were no 'grant' passes. For some of them, it was the first time they had worked for anything.
I've also had some fun...
My brothers came to visit from England. I took them to battle the crowds and the heat at Canada's Wonderland.
Slowly, my body is recovering. I stopped training what seems like forever ago. That was hard. Especially as I didn't know what was wrong and the MD kept blowing me off. I'm still waiting to get in to see a specialist! Little did I know that when my MD told me he would refer me to an Internist, what he actually meant was: 'let's just wait a little longer and see how sick you actually get'. You have to develop a loud voice when you're sick. I am thankful for Naturopaths.
I am also beginning to be thankful for my time off the bike. Especially now that, that time is not being spent between the couch and the bathroom.
So what have I been up to?...
I taught summer school to students who failed Grade 10 Math. I am not a Math teacher, but am pretty proud that 12 of the 20 students who started the class passed. I did not make it easy for them. I made them work for it. I made them learn every piece of the curriculum and they had to pass everything. Definitely rewarding to see them so proud of themselves on the last day, knowing that there were no 'grant' passes. For some of them, it was the first time they had worked for anything.
I've also had some fun...
My brothers came to visit from England. I took them to battle the crowds and the heat at Canada's Wonderland.
The next day, we ventured to Hardwood for some riding and then for a raft adventure in Kempenfelt Bay. Happy to say they had more fun on day 2.
Then, it was time for some holiday. Jeremy and I went up to Muskoka with bikes and swimsuits.
Stayed at this great place: http://www.treveneth.com/
In lieu of paying for your room, you are asked to donate the equivalent funds to the Northern Cancer Research Foundation.
A Saturday morning wander through Barrie's Downtown brought me here.
331 people drumming in unison broke the Guiness Book of World Records!
Thanks Damien for sharing your knowledge and drum so that I could be part of this event!
Today, I am not racing Kelso. And I sit out without the same sense of loss I felt at Hardwood or Buckwallow. I'll be back out there soon. But, in the meantime:
"Complaints about reality are immature."
— Timothy Findley (Not Wanted on the Voyage)
— Timothy Findley (Not Wanted on the Voyage)
Monday, July 4, 2011
mom
"It looks like we found the problem. Your tonsils are the size of golf balls."
They feel more like tennis balls. I hadn't eaten anything more than soup in days and even that was hard to swallow. I started feeling sick with a sore throat on Monday. By Wednesday things started getting worse and as I got home from work, the shivering started. My temperature was starting to rise and by that evening my fever was 102.5F! I've never felt so sick - or at least, don't remember ever feeling so sick. As the fever rose and my throat became more sore, I grabbed my cell phone and called Jeremy who was on the couch downstairs. I couldn't imagine getting out of bed.
He came upstairs begrudgingly. "When have you ever known me to not take care of myself when I'm sick?", I asked him. "Help me". He didn't know what to do. I don't know what I expected. My mom would have known, but I'd have to settle for my husband.
"What do you want me to do?" he asks.
"Make me feel better", I replied.
Eventually this conversation turned into him going to Hardwood to race the Wednesday Night Championships. I wasn't going to die, we decided, but my climbing fever was making me feel worse and worse.
Fast forward to Saturday, I finally called my mom to tell her I had Strep Throat. She asked if I'd been eating and I said 'not much'. She got right in her car and came down, despite my pleas for her not to. The house is a disaster and I'm pretty sure there were things growing in the kitchen sink, it had been so long since I'd felt well enough to clean.
That's the great thing about moms. She didn't care and when she arrived she set about making me feel better. Four hours later, in a now clean kitchen, she'd made my favorite German dish... roladen - a yummy stew with thin slices of beef wrapped around pickles. It was somehow perfect to make me feel better.
I don't know what her secret is, but my mom always knows what will make me feel better when I'm sick - all of it is psychological for sure as the only cure for me right now is the bottle of Amoxicillin on my kitchen counter. Not to knock my husband's efforts, but he just isn't mom.
They feel more like tennis balls. I hadn't eaten anything more than soup in days and even that was hard to swallow. I started feeling sick with a sore throat on Monday. By Wednesday things started getting worse and as I got home from work, the shivering started. My temperature was starting to rise and by that evening my fever was 102.5F! I've never felt so sick - or at least, don't remember ever feeling so sick. As the fever rose and my throat became more sore, I grabbed my cell phone and called Jeremy who was on the couch downstairs. I couldn't imagine getting out of bed.
He came upstairs begrudgingly. "When have you ever known me to not take care of myself when I'm sick?", I asked him. "Help me". He didn't know what to do. I don't know what I expected. My mom would have known, but I'd have to settle for my husband.
"What do you want me to do?" he asks.
"Make me feel better", I replied.
Eventually this conversation turned into him going to Hardwood to race the Wednesday Night Championships. I wasn't going to die, we decided, but my climbing fever was making me feel worse and worse.
Fast forward to Saturday, I finally called my mom to tell her I had Strep Throat. She asked if I'd been eating and I said 'not much'. She got right in her car and came down, despite my pleas for her not to. The house is a disaster and I'm pretty sure there were things growing in the kitchen sink, it had been so long since I'd felt well enough to clean.
That's the great thing about moms. She didn't care and when she arrived she set about making me feel better. Four hours later, in a now clean kitchen, she'd made my favorite German dish... roladen - a yummy stew with thin slices of beef wrapped around pickles. It was somehow perfect to make me feel better.
I don't know what her secret is, but my mom always knows what will make me feel better when I'm sick - all of it is psychological for sure as the only cure for me right now is the bottle of Amoxicillin on my kitchen counter. Not to knock my husband's efforts, but he just isn't mom.
Tuesday, June 21, 2011
making the best of it
So, this illness, or whatever it is has been dragging its heels. Just when I thought I was better, WHAM, GI started acting up again. I'll spare you the gory details... but, thank you so much to those who have listened to them. It's nice to not suffer alone.
Last week we had 2 Trek Women events planned. I really didn't have the energy for either of them, but dragged my butt to both of them. I guess it shouldn't be surprising how grumpy not being able to keep food in long enough for your body to get the goodness out of it makes you. Getting out with the Ladies was awesome to make me forget how crappy I've been feeling. They are all so excited to ride and watching them learn new skills and be excited about it was enough to erode my new-found grumpy disposition.
I had some great pictures of the rides, but they got lost. Instead, here is a picture of tonight's dinner. Not to show off my culinary skills, but to display my returning appetite. I finished the whole dinner and half of the bowl of fruit AND my stomach did not rebel! Trust me, that is pretty exciting.
Last week we had 2 Trek Women events planned. I really didn't have the energy for either of them, but dragged my butt to both of them. I guess it shouldn't be surprising how grumpy not being able to keep food in long enough for your body to get the goodness out of it makes you. Getting out with the Ladies was awesome to make me forget how crappy I've been feeling. They are all so excited to ride and watching them learn new skills and be excited about it was enough to erode my new-found grumpy disposition.
I had some great pictures of the rides, but they got lost. Instead, here is a picture of tonight's dinner. Not to show off my culinary skills, but to display my returning appetite. I finished the whole dinner and half of the bowl of fruit AND my stomach did not rebel! Trust me, that is pretty exciting.
Sunday, June 12, 2011
Keep your eyes on the road
"OH SHIT, TAM!!!'
It's just after 4pm on Sunday and Jeremy and I are heading home from a great afternoon at Albion. I had another fun day cheering on friends and yelling at my husband from the Feed Zone.
I am in the passenger seat gazing out the window. I look around to see what has Jeremy so freaked out and see a white car flying through the air into the opposite ditch. Thankfully, we are a few cars back from the accident and our involvement is only as bystanders. Jeremy pulls the car over and calls 911, while I get out of the car to see if anyone needs help.
My first aid hasn't been recertified in years, but it all came back to me. Assessing the scene, I walked by a couple of cars whose occupants are okay, but are trapped in their cars. Unfortunately, a motorcyclist was involved and hit a car head on. She flew off her bike into the ditch. Her friend, who was unhurt was standing over her in shock when I arrived. "I know some first aid", I told him.
I spent 45 minutes in the ditch with her until the paramedics were able to get a back board on her and carry her out to a helicopter. In that time, she went from minimally breathing to needing CPR.
While stabilizing her at the side of the road, her friend tells me through tears that they were driving home from a charity ride when a car had swayed into oncoming traffic. None of us knew why, perhaps the driver had a medical emergency of his own that caused the accident, but more than likely it was due to falling asleep, being on a cell phone, or playing with the radio.
We spend so much of our lives driving, that it is easy to forget that we not only hold our lives in our hands, but also of other people out there on the road. This tragedy has reminded me how important it is to give the task at hand 100% focus.
I just learned that the motorcyclist did not make it. My love goes out to her family and friends.
It's just after 4pm on Sunday and Jeremy and I are heading home from a great afternoon at Albion. I had another fun day cheering on friends and yelling at my husband from the Feed Zone.
I am in the passenger seat gazing out the window. I look around to see what has Jeremy so freaked out and see a white car flying through the air into the opposite ditch. Thankfully, we are a few cars back from the accident and our involvement is only as bystanders. Jeremy pulls the car over and calls 911, while I get out of the car to see if anyone needs help.
My first aid hasn't been recertified in years, but it all came back to me. Assessing the scene, I walked by a couple of cars whose occupants are okay, but are trapped in their cars. Unfortunately, a motorcyclist was involved and hit a car head on. She flew off her bike into the ditch. Her friend, who was unhurt was standing over her in shock when I arrived. "I know some first aid", I told him.
I spent 45 minutes in the ditch with her until the paramedics were able to get a back board on her and carry her out to a helicopter. In that time, she went from minimally breathing to needing CPR.
While stabilizing her at the side of the road, her friend tells me through tears that they were driving home from a charity ride when a car had swayed into oncoming traffic. None of us knew why, perhaps the driver had a medical emergency of his own that caused the accident, but more than likely it was due to falling asleep, being on a cell phone, or playing with the radio.
We spend so much of our lives driving, that it is easy to forget that we not only hold our lives in our hands, but also of other people out there on the road. This tragedy has reminded me how important it is to give the task at hand 100% focus.
I just learned that the motorcyclist did not make it. My love goes out to her family and friends.
Sunday, June 5, 2011
Saturday
It's Saturday morning and I'm trying to harness my inner chi when the Yoga Intructor walks into the class. She is small, but powerful looking - almost in a cute way with short blonde hair and a friendly looking smile. Or, cute is what I thought until she starts talking about a race she's entering that involves jumping through hoops of fire. Today's class won't be easy.
I should be out at Hardwood preriding the Canada Cup course, but my GI system seems to have different plans for me this month. I woke up on Saturday and decided this weekend needed to be about fun off the bike and trying to find some positives in my forced time off. I also needed to get away from the computer and stop googling all of my symptoms, because nothing good comes out of that except waking up in the night worrying about the worst.
The instructor clasps her hands together in glee, 'aren't Saturday's the best'? I smile in agreement. Who could disagree? I woke up this morning early - I'm not very good at sleeping in, enjoyed coffee out of a real mug, hung out with my husband and now here I am about to enjoy some yoga on a stormy morning with a beautiful view of Kempenfelt Bay.
Sunday, I woke up feeling pretty good after an interesting session Saturday afternoon with a doctor of Chinese Medicine. I also woke up starving - the first sign of any sort of appetite in about two weeks. After a good breakfast, Jer and I headed out to the auto show at Burl's Creek. Not usually my thing, but it was super fun and I definitely got pretty excited about seeing some of the old cars. I tried to convince Jer that we needed to buy a '77 Corvette, but I think he has other plans.
From there we headed off to Hardwood as Super Spectators. I had a blast cheering on the riders with Meaghan, Eden, Charlotte and Jeremy, got to catch up with Hannah who has defected to the Nation of Quebec and truly enjoy the afternoon without the usual prerace jitters.
While I had a blast this weekend - I am really looking forward to getting back out there on the bike. I just haven't found anything I find more fun. But, it really doesn't matter what you're getting up to, you've gotta just love Saturday :)
I should be out at Hardwood preriding the Canada Cup course, but my GI system seems to have different plans for me this month. I woke up on Saturday and decided this weekend needed to be about fun off the bike and trying to find some positives in my forced time off. I also needed to get away from the computer and stop googling all of my symptoms, because nothing good comes out of that except waking up in the night worrying about the worst.
The instructor clasps her hands together in glee, 'aren't Saturday's the best'? I smile in agreement. Who could disagree? I woke up this morning early - I'm not very good at sleeping in, enjoyed coffee out of a real mug, hung out with my husband and now here I am about to enjoy some yoga on a stormy morning with a beautiful view of Kempenfelt Bay.
Sunday, I woke up feeling pretty good after an interesting session Saturday afternoon with a doctor of Chinese Medicine. I also woke up starving - the first sign of any sort of appetite in about two weeks. After a good breakfast, Jer and I headed out to the auto show at Burl's Creek. Not usually my thing, but it was super fun and I definitely got pretty excited about seeing some of the old cars. I tried to convince Jer that we needed to buy a '77 Corvette, but I think he has other plans.
From there we headed off to Hardwood as Super Spectators. I had a blast cheering on the riders with Meaghan, Eden, Charlotte and Jeremy, got to catch up with Hannah who has defected to the Nation of Quebec and truly enjoy the afternoon without the usual prerace jitters.
While I had a blast this weekend - I am really looking forward to getting back out there on the bike. I just haven't found anything I find more fun. But, it really doesn't matter what you're getting up to, you've gotta just love Saturday :)
Monday, May 30, 2011
Trek Women at the 8 Hour
Great day on Saturday with the Trek Women plus some Trek Men at the 8 Hour. Huge thanks to Charlotte and Eden for doing far more than their share of laps to cover for myself and Erica.
I got to try out a Woman's Specific 29er... best part of the 29er was rocking a rooty uphill after a dude who was walking told me 'good luck' in a sarcastic, there's no way you're gonna make it tone. The wheels just roll over everything and traction was superb. Funniest moment was eating s**t after taking my first corner. Good tool for learning to lean the bike more - those big wheels really turn when you turn the handlebar!
I got to try out a Woman's Specific 29er... best part of the 29er was rocking a rooty uphill after a dude who was walking told me 'good luck' in a sarcastic, there's no way you're gonna make it tone. The wheels just roll over everything and traction was superb. Funniest moment was eating s**t after taking my first corner. Good tool for learning to lean the bike more - those big wheels really turn when you turn the handlebar!
The Trek Women with our fancy new t-shirts... Thanks Ross!
photo courtesy CBatty
Friday, May 13, 2011
a few exciting things...
1. Learned to bunny hop a log - thanks P. Glassford!
above picture is not of me bunny hopping... pic by J. Bailey
2. Was interviewed for Muscle and Fitness Hers Magazine back in February. I made it into the May/June issue! Check out part of the article below...
looks like I got a new position at the shop too - haha
Monday, May 9, 2011
That's NOT the line!
Dave looks over his shoulder, "You in?".
"Yeah, I'm in."
It's summer, 1999 and we were enjoying a blue bird day at Whistler. It had snowed 4 inches overnight, which meant rain and mud in the village where we had planned on riding our mountain bikes. I happily switched gears that morning when Dave suggested we go skiing instead, especially as back then, riding mountain bikes was not a skill I possessed.
I turned right to follow Dave down a benign looking cat track, the fresh powder spraying up behind us. He turned left towards the pitch of the mountain and I blindly followed at the same speed. I had no idea what I'd agreed to be in on, but the competitive side of me had kicked in full force. Of course I was in.
The next thing I know my skis are no longer in touch with the snow and I'm sailing over a cornice. My first cornice and I'm launching it at a good speed. Then my skis are back on the ground and I'm straight lining a pretty steep pitch. I'm so excited with the rush of adrenaline and accomplishment from flying through the air that I forget to continue skiing. I roll to a stop at the bottom of the pitch in a pile of Tammy, skis and poles. I get up and look back at what I'd skied. Stoked. The explative that comes out of my mouth is for accomplishment.
A good amount of time after this, Dave and my friendship turned to a relationship. I can guarantee that if we were dating at the time of the cornice incidence, the F-word would have been directed quite differently.
As a kayak, ski and now bike instructor I have seen many relationships sour when one tries to teach the other. So, it is with great pleasure that I now teach for Trek's Women Who Ride program. This past Saturday, one of our new members, Kate decided that her fiancee, who is quite a talented rider and instructor was not the one that should be teaching her to ride. It was great to get out with her and others, pushing them to try new things and ride stuff a little faster, without the emotional attachment that can often end in arguments.
And the next day, Jeremy and I rode Buckwallow. I stopped at a rooty and rocky line I couldn't figure out. After trying it for a few minutes, I called to Jeremy who was fairly far down the trail. I was a little pissed, because what if I was hurt? didn't he care? he's such a jerk! He comes back, unhappy because I'm uphill of where he was and he had to climb up to me.
"I can't figure out the line"!
Jeremy waits as I try out the line he suggests, but I still don't get it after a few tries. He goes back and rides it. It turns out the line is completely different from what he told me. I try it one last time, but I'm now too frustrated to be successful. I take a deep breath so as not to get mad and ruin our day out. I decide to take a lesson from Kate and leave the rocky corner for another time when I'm either alone or with someone who I won't direct my frustrations at.
"Yeah, I'm in."
It's summer, 1999 and we were enjoying a blue bird day at Whistler. It had snowed 4 inches overnight, which meant rain and mud in the village where we had planned on riding our mountain bikes. I happily switched gears that morning when Dave suggested we go skiing instead, especially as back then, riding mountain bikes was not a skill I possessed.
I turned right to follow Dave down a benign looking cat track, the fresh powder spraying up behind us. He turned left towards the pitch of the mountain and I blindly followed at the same speed. I had no idea what I'd agreed to be in on, but the competitive side of me had kicked in full force. Of course I was in.
The next thing I know my skis are no longer in touch with the snow and I'm sailing over a cornice. My first cornice and I'm launching it at a good speed. Then my skis are back on the ground and I'm straight lining a pretty steep pitch. I'm so excited with the rush of adrenaline and accomplishment from flying through the air that I forget to continue skiing. I roll to a stop at the bottom of the pitch in a pile of Tammy, skis and poles. I get up and look back at what I'd skied. Stoked. The explative that comes out of my mouth is for accomplishment.
A good amount of time after this, Dave and my friendship turned to a relationship. I can guarantee that if we were dating at the time of the cornice incidence, the F-word would have been directed quite differently.
As a kayak, ski and now bike instructor I have seen many relationships sour when one tries to teach the other. So, it is with great pleasure that I now teach for Trek's Women Who Ride program. This past Saturday, one of our new members, Kate decided that her fiancee, who is quite a talented rider and instructor was not the one that should be teaching her to ride. It was great to get out with her and others, pushing them to try new things and ride stuff a little faster, without the emotional attachment that can often end in arguments.
And the next day, Jeremy and I rode Buckwallow. I stopped at a rooty and rocky line I couldn't figure out. After trying it for a few minutes, I called to Jeremy who was fairly far down the trail. I was a little pissed, because what if I was hurt? didn't he care? he's such a jerk! He comes back, unhappy because I'm uphill of where he was and he had to climb up to me.
"I can't figure out the line"!
Jeremy waits as I try out the line he suggests, but I still don't get it after a few tries. He goes back and rides it. It turns out the line is completely different from what he told me. I try it one last time, but I'm now too frustrated to be successful. I take a deep breath so as not to get mad and ruin our day out. I decide to take a lesson from Kate and leave the rocky corner for another time when I'm either alone or with someone who I won't direct my frustrations at.
Riding with Charlotte Batty, I was stoked to have ridden Boneshaker from the top for the first time!
aren't we cute with our matching bikes and kit??
Friday, April 22, 2011
Christmas in April
Some time in January my brand new Trek Top Fuel 9.8 WSD arrived. And it quickly took up residence in a quiet corner of the Store's basement. The plus side of being married to Trek Barrie's store manager is the beauty Top Fuel 9.8 that I've been privileged to ride for the last 3 seasons. The down side - my bikes get neglected until there is time around the shop to build them, which wasn't until the middle of last week.
Now, I know... you feel so sorry for me - whahhhh!!!! I can hear all of your little violins. Okay. I'll stop whining.
The new bike is AMAZING! Here's a picture: be JEALOUS :)
Got it out for a ride last week. Changes over last year include further weight reductions, stronger carbon designed for mountain bikers, front and rear shock lockouts conveniently located on the handlebar. Best part of the bike is still the ABP technology, which stands for Active Braking Pivot. While most rear shocks stiffen up when braking, ABP remains active - so on descents, when you need your rear shocks and brakes to work at the same time... they do.
Also, it's pretty. Which is important. Stolked to get it out on it's first race next weekend :)
Now, I know... you feel so sorry for me - whahhhh!!!! I can hear all of your little violins. Okay. I'll stop whining.
The new bike is AMAZING! Here's a picture: be JEALOUS :)
Got it out for a ride last week. Changes over last year include further weight reductions, stronger carbon designed for mountain bikers, front and rear shock lockouts conveniently located on the handlebar. Best part of the bike is still the ABP technology, which stands for Active Braking Pivot. While most rear shocks stiffen up when braking, ABP remains active - so on descents, when you need your rear shocks and brakes to work at the same time... they do.
Also, it's pretty. Which is important. Stolked to get it out on it's first race next weekend :)
Friday, April 15, 2011
Losing the X from Small
I step out of the dressing room, presenting myself to the salesgirl.
She doesn’t blink. She looks at me like an art curator trying to assess the value of a vase. A rather large vase.
“Carina,” she decides finally. Cute.
I ask her in Italian if she could please tell me honestly whether these jeans are causing me to resemble a cow.
No, signorina, I am told. You do not resemble a cow.
“Do I resemble a pig, then?” (E. Gilbert)
A similar conversation has taken place almost daily with my far too patient husband. I no longer fit into my very skinny jeans. Jeans that if I am honest, would not have fit me after I hit puberty and I was skinny then. There is a part of my brain that is okay with this. It is the part of me that looks in the mirror and sees muscle, the part that revels in my ability to do pull-ups and push-ups (full man ones - not to be sexist), and loves the numbers that my Powertap so brilliantly displays.
But, the other side of my brain (the not logical and somewhat annoying part) looks in the mirror and does not like what she sees. My legs are big, my jeans are tight and the waist is baggy. Not hot to this side of my brain.
But what all of me agrees on is how fantastic I feel. I've been in a bad mood and somewhat depressed for 4 years. Coincidentally - completely coincidentally this is also how long I've been married. It all started when I dropped about 20 pounds over a span of 2 months leading up to our wedding - much to the seamstress' chagrine as each time I was fitted in my wedding gown, she had to take my dress in another inch. Now, noone loses that much weight all at once, so I think she thought she was going crazy. And, I was eating - or so I thought. But certainly it was not enough food and it certainly wasn't the right food. At about the same time I started having panic attacks and the moodiness had started. I put it all down to stress, of which I had a lot: I was quitting my job, moving to Barrie to live with Jeremy, my mom was selling my childhood house, I was buying a house but was about to be jobless and I was planning a wedding. Enough to send anyone for a loop, but the problem is, I never really recovered.
Eventually, my poor nutrition led to sleepless nights, 3am wakeups to eat (when I did sleep at all), depression, anxiety, mood swings and lack of energy. Trying to ride my bike on top of this led to frequent illness - but, I put that down to being a teacher and being around sick kids. Everything can be justified.
Changing what I've been eating was step #1 and it got me to 80% healthy. But the perfectionist that I am wants 100% health. So step #2 involved upping the calories. That part was hard. I wasn't starving myself on purpose. But, I'd be lying if I said I didn't enjoy looking in the mirror and seeing the skinny me. I hate to eat and even as I type this, I am sitting here with my lunch which is getting neglected in favour of well, my blog at the moment, but I'd rather do ANYTHING than sit here and eat for half an hour to forty minutes - which is about how long it takes me to get enough calories in. That coupled with the thought that skinny people probably climb hills better and fit better into their jeans perpetuated the cycle.
So, now my jeans don't fit and I am forced to swallow the good advice that I've given to a few colleagues and friends who are frustrated when they eat healthy food and don't see the numbers dropping on the scale. When you eat healthy food and exercise, you may not lose weight - in fact, you might gain weight in the form of muscle . I have gained muscle (and weight). You can see it on my legs. But none of that matters. What matters is that I feel great. I sleep great. I am in a good mood almost all the time. I can manage life's daily stress and still keep a smile on my face. I'll keep telling the annoying side of my brain this fact until all of me believes it.
So, now my jeans don't fit and I am forced to swallow the good advice that I've given to a few colleagues and friends who are frustrated when they eat healthy food and don't see the numbers dropping on the scale. When you eat healthy food and exercise, you may not lose weight - in fact, you might gain weight in the form of muscle . I have gained muscle (and weight). You can see it on my legs. But none of that matters. What matters is that I feel great. I sleep great. I am in a good mood almost all the time. I can manage life's daily stress and still keep a smile on my face. I'll keep telling the annoying side of my brain this fact until all of me believes it.
Thursday, April 7, 2011
Wine, Cheese, Bicycles and Women
Now that I have your attention boys, this one is only for the WOMEN. The first meeting of Trek Women will take place at Trek Store Barrie on Monday April 11th at 6pm. (If you live in Toronto, their meeting will be held at the Trek Toronto store on Saturday April 9 at 6pm).
This is your chance to find out more about the club, meet fellow club members and snack on cheese and wine. You can also sign-up for the club.
The cost to join all club rides is $40. Dates for the rides are posted here.
This is your chance to find out more about the club, meet fellow club members and snack on cheese and wine. You can also sign-up for the club.
The cost to join all club rides is $40. Dates for the rides are posted here.
Monday, March 28, 2011
It's good to be home
An uneventful plane ride (which is always the best kind) and 8 hours later, I was being greeted by my husband at the airport.
I owe my husband more than thanks for picking me up at the airport – although, it seems this has become his part-time job; between my frequent visits to England to visit my dad and to B.C. to see my mom. He is always there to pick me up.
I’d like to take this chance to thank him for being so supportive of my extended vacation. I have returned a much happier person than the one who left with a lot of perspective and an improved outlook on my career.
two bikes in one box meant a lot of reassembly...
I have terrible spatial awareness and find working on my bike really difficult. But I persevered and was proud of my accomplishment - my bike in one piece and ready to ride. The jazz hands are to show excitement :)
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